amniöt Experiencer Notebook

Typical Children 40

• You are Not You do not cross the abyss; you do not set sail on those black waters with sword in hand to strike at the goal; there is no attainment of mastery to pin to the lapel, no experience of the beyond for you to know; the you as you know yourself comes to an end, the you that you know is a self-perpetuating program in the mental ... Journal Entry Universe 2020
• Metatron burns... Metatron burns in your heart my dear The lady and man in one... Journal Entry Dream 2017
• A note of encouragement for my Friends All of the most ecstatic, elated, jubilant, exciting, delicious, rewarding moments of my life are so great and so appreciated, there are no complaints here. And yet they are just as important, just as deep, just as potentially fulfilling as *this present moment*. There is no better place or time or entity to be than he... Harmony Journal Entry Friends Cosmology 2016
• Commune i want very much to connect more with you, my friends. i have been so overwhelmed and confused so easily in this life. i am neither silently judging you nor wanting to hide. i realize the danger and shallowness of both harsh criticism and overly excessive tenderness. i am trying to sort through how i really think and feel c... Journal Entry Friends 2016
• _______________________ i am tired of fighting against the terrible disdain of a planet full of imbeciles. you constantly beat me down with your hateful and negative thoughts, feelings and actions which root from the hatred and rejection of yourselves and the hearts inside that you don't accept. you do not see past the length of your eyelashes, yo... Emotion Friends Thought Journal Entry 2014
• IPShOSh Journal Entry Language (Type)Wisdom 2014
• Lily Book Find Books Thought Connectivity Journal Entry Mammal 2013
• <3 Screenshot Friends Journal Entry 2013
• Big tropical space hotel condo tropical parents owned but gone setting up a party there jetskiing in foamy charred ocean waves, closing jetski plugs, beachouse, man talking about making a job out of teaching jetski classes restaurant with fancy bathrooms. big open area, box w/evil sorceress queen, torturing half the ppl in box with golden... Journal Entry Dream Plantae 2013
• Dreamhaus Dream Screenshot Friends Journal Entry 2013
• Grimey under my grime is spit-shine the lightbulb hum harmonizes in and out with the music eye cross dress the vision will go as far as you let it, it can always go further learned a lot about self-sex agitated erection develops from astral projection doubling the 1-to-2 lengthening the holy books of chaos magick chaos bei... Journal Entry Emotion 2011
• new luna in Virgo 1: cicadas coming out of the ground slowly, then faster, surrounding and wanting to lay near some other animal friend i had, they began to swarm and i had to run inside to avoid the buzzing cloud. 2: professional waterslide rider. love triangle of deception and betrayal. 3: dirtbike offroad escape, pulled over and tickete... Journal Entry Dream 2011
• luna in Taurus inside noah's restaurant, it's more like a spa, i met a goth-punk girl who is expressive about being a lesbian. we seemed interested in eachother despite her adamence about only liking girls. i go to take a shower in this restaurant-spa, the ppl i'm with don't seem to notice me undressing lots of crazy different kinds of cl... Journal Entry Dream 2011
• luna full in aquarius/pisces cusp big slinky reptilian felines in a huge cage in a house... one of them escapes and is making the normal house cats very panicky. nobody [family] in the house believes that there is anything wrong///... Journal Entry Dream 2011
• luna in Capricorn suburban house party w/l, left w/j to go in to a city bcs he wanted more dancing, went into a mall with a store with glass cases full of metal snake pieces, police are there, they ask where i am coming from, i said i moved here from iowa recently, they said this is the guy, they stuck me with a long poison metal rod and the... Journal Entry Dream 2011
• ( ) Screenshot Journal Entry 2011
• Basilisk of Light + p.VI if you stay naive you can remain innocent of everything. "the exposure of innocence is a lie" the joy you share with others is also my joy. give me all your attempts to make me sorry. to addict me to sorrow. it is fun to wander into the clouds but carelessness attracts malignant forces and to stay high you walk on our... (Type)Wisdom Friends Journal Entry 2011
• Vivid Dream This dream wasn't like the others It was a dark warehouse like the others But darker Too dark We enter groundfloor There was a group (5) that split Then just two of us (Liz) We are in a strange room with what appears to be a shaft with large pipes running through it that leads sort of both up and out. The monsters d... Dream Friends Journal Entry 2011
• Masters, Mankind, Metamorphosis i do love you: the precious few who still support me in the dark hours* of my Metamorphosis. when my skin is tender with the remnants of broken sentiments and i strike-out** at thy delicate touch. i realize this process hurts us both. also do i love all of Mankind and its putrid over-emphasis on mundaneness***, for... (Type)Wisdom Thought Friends Journal Entry 2011
• Trinitempli O3O experimentation = invocation = divination alchemy = goetia = qabalah SCIENCE = RELIGION = PHILOSOPHY dualism = monism = nihilism 2 = 1 = 0 wisdom = understanding = knowledge 3 = 8 = 1 trances/paths: mechanica/fortune = joy/sorrow = self/less 0 = 3 = 2 Mercury = Sulphur = Salt ... (Type)Wisdom Cosmology Journal Entry 2011
• MIRRORACLE the strongest weapon is the mirror i fight my enemies with naught else for self-centeredness is the most self-less possibility... Emotion Cosmology Journal Entry 2011
• I am death I need no one. No one is worth my time. You are fucking twisted and I'm done telling you so. Bye twitter, last post. there was a time when I gave up everything for this race. But it was a mistake, you are fucking cruel, replaceable and left me in your shit You built tall walls to keep me out but keep your selfish shit... Friends Journal Entry 2011
• Basilisk of Light - p.IV you may love me unconditionally but you do not want me. if you do then what's stopping you? what has always stopped you? is it that i show weakness, humanness? i cannot constantly play God and let you transgress all modes of my human selfness. i am meant to be like this: vulnerable. how you truly feel about me y... Friends Emotion Journal Entry 2011
• Depths funny how we think we can see so much of our world with the naked eye - not so! i've come to this approach to life: be excited for death yet focused on life... death in this shell to me seems like the beginning of high adventure... yeah, but you need an ultra elite electron microscope to get those badass shots normal one... (Type)Wisdom Journal Entry 2010
• Apologiae Exacerbacione i apologize to my friends for being assumptive and over imaginative and for giving confusing and/or paranoid and/or selfish communicationss i am learning through "failure" at this... Friends Emotion Journal Entry 2010
• How to proceed? ((solved)) "the object of Incarnation is to obtain its reactions to its relations with other incarnated Beings and to observe theirs with each other" "incarnation" here is speaking about incarnation out of the supernal triad and down into the actual and material zones where one angel (magickal clothing of the microcosm) can obser... Friends Emotion Journal Entry 2010
• illusion + experiencer = reality the illusion of free will (in organisms) creates the reality of free will (for their creator and the creature) because they act on that sensation of free will. so since they think they are in control of their organism, they can truly act outside the expectations of their creator ('new' things are possible!). if the... Cosmology Emotion Journal Entry 2010
• Love and Sunbeams you said i needed love and sunshine you said you'd give it for a moment... Friends Journal Entry 2010
• Statuz trys to unwind culture by passively offering foreign objects up for inspection /// has become the fool on the hill... (Type)Wisdom Journal Entry 2010
• Find Others honing the netweb glue trap find thee others where be u... Friends Journal Entry 2010
• Demiurgic Growth Vat Dumping is that y we've been grown in this vat? bcs a sorrow-enshrouded world(view) creates the best kind of art [when one overcomes it]? we are a steaming pile of creative spark ripe for the dumping back in to the galactic mind stew... Cosmology Journal Entry 2010
• Racial Murders almost no one can properly define what race is without an anthropological degree. racism tends to self-generate. white people killing blacks makes blacks hate whites. makes whites hate whites. makes whites that already hated blacks hate them more for being upset. the linguistic mechanics of "black and white" is a... Friends Journal Entry 2010
• True Finding true love and true enjoyment can be pretty detrimental to the human mind... Friends Journal Entry 2010
• Detachment Entrapment [hidden prologue] you'd love me if i didn't care where i was how i was received who cared and y is sentimentality my biggest weakness? that i care? teach me how to detach tech me how to be unconditionally... Emotion Yoga Friends Journal Entry 2010
• "i gonna fight ya with my heart and soul" .. and yet the more we fight, the more rights they steal.. does fighting now mean shutting up? this is not a civil rights era, you will not be granted rights in response to direct actions, you will be punished because the majority actually would rather support tyranny over freedom and live in their little comfort cag... Journal Entry Friends 2010
• so ready to watch society burn i will be stoking the cleansing fire nervous they are, those that wish to live without giving. the more they draw guns, the more nervousness they reveal. their sinking financial projections, the controllers/bankers know and they are so so frightened. fear turns to insidious plans. total collapse is now inevitable. Sean Ma... Journal Entry Friends 2010
• Astral Gateway Skull 1-performing full moon ritual out in the field (which was specifically geared towards contacting the astral body) [2010-03-30@2AM] 2-having partially achieved a wonder-trance (via transmuting a sorrow-trance) which i felt under the spell of when i first saw the skull (so the find was perhaps a direct reward for ach... Foundskull + Vertebrae Journal Entry Emotion 2010
• white journal '10 one nothing -> one source -> one playground... Cosmology Yoga Journal Entry 2010
• Alice (in Wonderland (in 3D)) ... would've been better in psilocybin-vision. Perhaps then the 75% of the audience that did not realize that the dragon was actually a symbol for the inner-demon of illusion called Choronzon and that the entire film was actually a multi-layered metaphorical symbol of incredible subtlety. The film masterfully encourages the... Video Gatherings Journal Entry 2010
• yellow journal '10 only creating internal frictions concerning "one's own" morality of "one's own" actions can be said to be "false will" (as in opposition to the Thelemic idea of True Will) all will is one will above the abyss, likewise, there true and false do not exist Anything in quotes above is a conventionalized lie concerning the nat... Harmony Journal Entry Cosmology 2010

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